Understanding the Difficulty of Asking for Our Worth

The following is a guest post by Colleen Kong Savage, an illustrator and designer transitioning from being a stay-at-home mom for over a decade to making her way as a freelancer. In this piece, she explores the complexities of valuing our work and the challenges that come with asking for what we deserve.

Many individuals experience discomfort when it comes to discussing financial compensation. For instance, while some confidently negotiate their worth, others shy away from these conversations altogether. This tension often stems from deep-rooted societal norms and personal insecurities about money.

Colleen’s journey into the freelance world began with an earnest endeavor two years ago, but her first year was primarily focused on securing work rather than negotiating pay. Having navigated the daunting landscape of job applications, she faced the reality of her situation head-on, illustrating the struggle many freelancers encounter in defining their worth.

Why Is It Difficult to Ask for What You're Worth?

Asking for fair compensation can be a formidable challenge. Colleen's experience reflects a common dilemma faced by many in creative fields. After months of dwindling finances and self-esteem, a potential client finally reached out for her illustration services. When asked about pricing, Colleen hesitated, realizing too late that she should have initiated the conversation by inquiring about the client's budget.

In her situation, desperation influenced her decision-making. With a rush job on her hands, she settled on a price that, in hindsight, translated to an unacceptably low hourly rate. This scenario raises a vital question: why is it so hard for many of us to ask for what we truly deserve?

The Unpleasant Reality of Low Pay

After completing the illustration, Colleen calculated her effective hourly wage and found it alarmingly low. Even though she was eager to learn and grow, the experience highlighted a common issue in the freelance world: creatives often undervalue their work due to a lack of business acumen.

Many creatives dread discussing financial matters. Whether it’s quoting a rate, negotiating a job, or seeking a raise, these conversations can provoke anxiety and self-doubt. The critical question remains: why do we struggle to ask for fair compensation?

Six Reasons Why It's Hard to Ask for What You're Worth

1. Money Is a Taboo Subject

In many cultures, discussing money is considered inappropriate. The phrase, "If you have to ask, you can’t afford it," is widely circulated, creating an environment where many avoid financial discussions altogether. This taboo can lead to feelings of insecurity regarding one's financial situation, and the fear of being perceived as greedy or inadequately successful can hinder open conversations about pay.

2. Lack of Transparency About Earnings

It's not uncommon for individuals to remain unaware of their peers' salaries. In many workplaces, people discuss their dissatisfaction with pay but seldom reveal actual figures. This secrecy can lead to misperceptions and feelings of inadequacy, especially when comparing oneself to others without a clear understanding of the financial landscape.

3. Self-Belief and Confidence

Believing in one's value is crucial when negotiating pay. Many individuals struggle to recognize their worth, especially in competitive fields. This lack of confidence can stem from various factors, including upbringing, personal experiences, and comparisons with peers. Realizing that your contributions are valuable and worthy of fair compensation is a crucial step toward successful negotiation.

4. Overcoming Imposter Syndrome

Imposter syndrome affects many professionals, leading them to doubt their abilities and accomplishments. This mindset can make it difficult to assert one's worth in financial negotiations. The fear of being exposed as a fraud can paralyze individuals when it comes to discussing their pay.

5. Emotional Investment in Work

When individuals are emotionally attached to their projects, asking for money can feel daunting. This emotional entanglement can amplify fears of rejection or inadequacy. If a client declines a proposed fee, it may feel like a personal affront rather than a business decision, making it even harder to negotiate effectively.

6. Fear of Losing Opportunities

The fear of scaring off potential clients is pervasive among freelancers. Many worry that asking for fair compensation will drive clients away. This anxiety can lead to underpricing services, ultimately devaluing one's work and contributing to a cycle of financial struggle.

Understanding Your Worth to Secure Fair Pay

It’s essential to recognize your value in the marketplace. Illustrator Will Terry advocates for freelancers to determine their "rock bottom" price—the minimum they would accept for their work. This figure should be informed by factors such as the project's potential and the client's reputation.

• Assess your skills and experience.
• Research industry standards for your profession.
• Account for your living expenses and financial goals.

By establishing a baseline number, you can feel more empowered during negotiations. Doubling this figure can provide a buffer, allowing for potential negotiations without feeling underprepared or vulnerable.

Ultimately, practice makes perfect. The more you engage in conversations about money, the more comfortable you will become. Each experience—whether successful or not—contributes to your growth and confidence in asking for fair compensation.

Building Your Brand Online as a Freelancer

Establishing a personal website is an invaluable step for freelancers. By creating a professional online presence, you can showcase your work, connect with clients, and leverage opportunities that may not have been available otherwise. Your website can serve as a portfolio, a hub for potential clients to find you, and a platform to sell your services.

According to Colleen’s experience, having an online presence has opened doors for new consulting opportunities and freelance work. She emphasizes the importance of having your own website rather than relying solely on social media platforms.

Managing Your Finances Effectively

Consider using financial management tools to gain better control over your finances. Platforms like Empower can help you track expenses, manage investments, and create a clearer picture of your financial health. By linking all your accounts, you can monitor your spending patterns and identify areas for improvement.

Utilizing these tools can lead to better financial decision-making and help you achieve your financial goals more effectively.

Stay Informed and Motivated Through Community

Engaging with communities and resources that discuss financial literacy can be incredibly beneficial. Subscribing to newsletters or podcasts that focus on personal finance can provide insights and strategies for navigating financial conversations. Consider subscribing to Financial Samurai's newsletter to receive valuable content tailored to freelancers and those seeking financial independence.

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